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Where Do I find the Answers?

Tsyuko was a young man being raised by his dad in Japan. Like most boys in his situation he wanted to have a whole family again, Tsyuko was able to have a new one with a loving father that remarried and even got a little sister in Chelsea with his new mom. They spent many days learning about each other, loving and understanding each other to become a family. Two years have past since Tsyuko's family got a reboot and now he got into the high school he wanted to get in and become a musician. His family in celebration of this and his graduation of middle school spend a whole day out around town, going out to eat, going to laser tag, and going to the movies. It was a late movie and after such a fun day, everyone is noticeably tired and they decide to head home.

Tsyuko's mother ask's him on the way home in a quiet cheerful tone "Did you enjoy yourself today?"

Tsyuko responds with a tired smile in the backseat with his head in his hand looking out of the window "Today was the best day ever, thanks mom and dad, for everything" as he finishes his sentence a big truck comes speeding by but something is wrong.

The truck is swerving, Tsyuko father looks over to see the truck "What are they doing"

He honks his horn at the truck as it continues to swerve. When the truck gets near the car it swerves near them.

Tsyuko's mother quickly says "Hold on kids"

They are on a road of by a mountain and swerve to dodge the truck but they didn't slow down the car enough too safely stop, as they go over the cliff, in this brief moment Chelsea is asleep in the car and Tsyuko throws himself over her to protect her from as much damage of the fall as he can. Then a quick jerk and crashing noise.

Tsyuko wakes up to find his head is bleeding and his sister is crying holding her shoulder.

Tsyuko: (While holding his head where blood is coming from) Chelsea, are you hurt or bleeding?

She responds while fighting through tears "My shoulder hurts bad and I cant move my arm"

Tsyuko: (While pating her on the head) tells her "Just breathe through the pain, I need to look at it. This is gonna hurt a little but I need to do this to help."

Chelsea sobbing simply nods yes and allows Tsyuko to look at her shoulder, as he looks at her shoulder as best as he can, he see's that the impact has caused the seat belt too dislocate her arm from her shoulder.

Tsyuko "Im going to see what mom and dad think we should do now, mom may be able to do something"

Tsyuko looks to his parents too ask what to do, too his horror he see's tree branches in front of the car have pierced through and around them. The car is caught in a tree near the cliff.

Tsyuko in a panic begins to take off his seat belt and yell for his parents " Mom, dad are you okay answer me, did the branches hit you, do you need help?"

Then a horrific noise is heard, the sound of branches creaking and cracking, the fall isnt over.

Tsyuko's parents respond weakly but encouragingly

Tsyuko's mother " We're okay, hows Chelsea?"

Tsyuko " she is hurt, she says that she cant move her arm that she's holding."

Tsyukos father " It probably broken or dislocated, don,t worry sweetie we are going to get you to a doctor as soon as we are out of here. Tsyuko, a branch did hit me but its okay, we need to get out of the car though, do you see any openings back there?"

Tsyuko is still worried about his parents and begins to breathe fast and then as if reading his mind, his father tells him.

Tsyuko's Father "Everything will be okay but I need you to calm down and look around for any openings. Okay son."

Tsyuko calms down a bit, nods his head and begins to look around too finds the back window broken and exclaims.

Tsyuko " Yes the back window is broken"

Tsyuko's father quickly responds with " Okay grab Chelsea as gently as you can and leave out to the back of the car, then find a branch that you can move too and sit on, you've climbed trees before remember."

Tsyuko's mother " Chelsea, Tsyuko has to grab you and I know your hurting but I need you to endure it, can you do that for mom'."

Chelsea through tears and sobbing "Yes".

Tsyuko " What about you guys?"

Tsyuko's father " We will be right behind you as soon as I get this branch off me."

Tsyuko doesn't know but one of the branches has pierced his father through his right shoulder and pined him to his seat. While his mother is noticeable hurt but has a branch just near her shoulder and one near her right side of her ribs. Neither branch isn't close enough to stop her from helping her husband but could have been worse off if just a little closer. She takes in a deep breath and to calm herself from the pain she is experiencing to continue helping her husband.

Tsyuko's mother " I am going to help your father get this off, your father is right we will be right behind you" as she finishes the cracking sound grows

Tsyuko grabs Chelsea as easy as he can and they make their way to the back of the car while they hear creaking noises. They move as slow as possible as to not cause the branches to break any faster. They make their way out of the car through broken glass and sharp corners where the back window use to be, making their way to the opposite side of the tree where a big branch is.

Tsyuko asks his siter to hold onto him as tight as possible, as they move toward the large branch. Tsyuko is beginning to feel light headed as they move toward they tree, he has lost a some blood the head injury is beginning to affect him. Once they reach the big branch, Tsyuko places Chelsea on the branch, he then takes his own sit near the intersection of the branch and trunk of the tree due to his sick feeling.

Tsyuko then calls out that they have made it onto a branch and asks " Are you guys okay, are you coming out now"

Tsyuko's mother is trying to break the branch that is in his fathers shoulder to get out.

She responds by saying "We are fine this tree is just stuck on the door making it hard for us to get out".

As she continuously is flinching from the pain of her own injuries, while trying to help her husband get out. She then begins to cough, she feels a very wet and warm sensation on her hand that causes her to look at her hand. She notices that it is blood, one of her broken ribs must have caused some internal bleeding with all he moving and helping. Tsyuko's mother thinks to herself about how to best go about this or start preparing for the worse. Just then some hope is restored, as a flash of light is seen through the windows and Tsyuko's mother immediately cries out to Tsyuko.

Tsyuko's Mother "can you see the person with the flash light".

Tsyuko begins to look up toward the cliff edge where the car fell from. His headache is still bothering him but he pushes through to look and finally see's it. With a tearful smile and exclaims

Tsyuko "Yes, I see them. Hey, we are down here".

A passerby saw the swerving Truck stopped a while back but luckily continued up too the broken rail guard. The passerby immediately stops the car with his girlfriend now awake due to the sudden stop.

Passerby Girlfriend "Is everything okay hun?"

Passerby "I think someone might need some help, the guard rail is badly broken. Call 911 while I look and see if we can help."

Passerby Girlfriend "Be Careful, the ledge seems slick you may slip."

Taking his girlfriends advice into consideration he takes a small flash light that was in his glove compartment. He walks over to the right side of the broken guard rail to be extra careful. He then turns on his light to have decent lighting to look. While looking he hears someone shouting, to find Tsyuko and Chelsea on the Branch clearly hurt.

He yells down " Hey how is everyone? The police and ambulance should be here any minute."

Tsyuko's mother tries to yell back but is in too much pain to respond herself. Tsyuko's father responds mustering up what little strength he has left due to blood loss

Tsyuko's Father "Thank you we are all hurt. Our kids made it out onto a sturdy branch, can you see them?"

The passerby now looks for the where the voice is coming from, to see that the car is caught in the Tree. Not wanting them to panic he decides to respond before taking any other action.

Passerby "Yes I do, but I cant reach them from here. I have some rope in my car."

The passerby then turns to his car and calls out to his girlfriend

Passerby "Honey bring me the rope"

Then the worse happens, two of the branches holding up the car begin to break. Hearing this Tsyuko immediately looks towards the car to see it moving downward and begins to panic again while calling out to his parents.

Tsyuko "Mom, dad, do you need help getting out of the car? I can come help you"

As he is saying this Tsyuko is making his way back carefully and slowly towards the car. His injuries are starting to worsen. Tsyuko's parents see him heading towards the car in the cracked rear view mirror. They both tell Tsyuko.

Tsuko's Mom and Dad "Stay away son."

Tsyuko's mother "We are almost done, I promise.".

As his mother continues to try and break the branch that has impaled Tsyuko's father. That branch has now sunk deeper into his shoulder due too the other branches breaking and the car moving closer towards the ground. However, thanks to this course of events as well as the angle of the car, the branch she is finally able to break the branch and remove the other half from he husband. Tsyuko's father yells out while hiding his pain as best as he can. Tsyko's mother tries to calm the situation before it can start due to the yell and simply says.

Tsyuko's mother " I got your father out now, we are headed up".

Tsyuko's mother takes the shirt that Tsyuko wore for graduation that stayed in the car when he took it off to be more comfortable cloths to be in afterward. She ties the shirt around his shoulder to stop the bleeding. Seeing that it isn't going to properly stay in place, she then unties her husbands tie and ties it around the shirt giving better pressure and keeping the shirt in place. Tsyuko slows down at the third branch away from the car, only to be slowed down by a dizzy sensation that almost causes him to slip and fall so he decides to sit down and call out to his parent again.

Tsyuko "Mom do you guys need help?"

Tsyuko looks up to see what the passerby is up to, to find that he is setting up a rope to climb down. Tsyuko, happy at this sight, he turns to his parents.

Tsyuko "Mom, they guy has a rope and is climbing down to help us"

Suddenly three more branches snap as his parents just reached the back seat to fall back onto the driver and passenger chair. Tsyuko's father is now doing his best to move and help them up the car using his adrenaline as its kicked in. He has Tsyuko's mothers arm around his good shoulder to use all the strength that he has to get them out as fast as he can. While tsyukos mother is helping by using her remaining strength through her legs to help maintain balance and support for her husband doing the pulling and climbing.

After some struggling they make it to the back window with a branch off to the side the can reach for to help them out. Just as they are reaching for the branch the last branch really holding the car up begins to break. In a freeze frame like moment Tsyuko looks down to see the car falling and his parents falling with the car. In horror and panic, Tsyuko reaches out for his parents, while his parents reach out for the branch close to them only to find they aren't close enough to reach it. Holding their arms up they look up at Tsyuko and say.

Tsuko's Mother and Father "We love you and Chelsea so much."

The last branch full breaks and the car falls, as Tsyuko watches his parents fall with the car. The passerby is about to climb down when he see's the car plummet to the ground below, in shock is now at a standstill on the side of the cliff.

Chelsea screams "MOTHER!!!!!" as she hears the crashing of the car "Papa..." beginning to sob now.

The passerby looks on in horror as the car crashes down to the ground his self but snaps back to reality to descend towards Chelsea and Tsyuko to bring them up to the road.

Chelsea "What about my mom go down for her, please, she may need more help than us we're okay, go help mommy and dad"

The man just clinches his teeth knowing that they couldn't have survived, once he brings Chelsea to the street he passes her to his girlfriend, he go's back for Tsyuko, who looks as if he is frozen in place, expressionless, motionless. When the ambulance and police arrive Tsyuko and Chelsea are looked at by paramedics.

The passerby is being question by the cops as Tsyuko and Chelsea are being cared for by the paramedics.

Lead officer: "What made you guys stop to help these people?"

Passerby: "We saw the damage here on the guard rails and went to see if we could help immediately or if we were to late. I guess we were both today.

Lead officer: "We don't know that yet, we have a team headed down to the car now to see if the driver and passenger are okay."

The lead officer notices that the passerby is frustrated by his comment. Knowing well that it would be a miracle if they survived the drop. Needing to keep the passerby comfortable and able to answer more questions, he switches gears and applauds the passerby's efforts.

Lead officer: "I gotta say, its a good thing you two had that rope to reach the kids. It would have taken us longer to reach those kids if wasn't for you and we could be looking at a worse situation. With the shape of those kids I'm surprised that they made it out of the car."

Passerby:" We were finishing with some camping that we like to do around this time of year. We like to be ready for anything. You know I just remembered seeing a big truck stopped near the last gas station from behind us. Did you guys see the driver or the truck?

Lead officer: "We did and suspect he may be the cause of the accident based on his testimony when he was caught stumbling into his car at the gas station. He said he needed to stop because he though he made someone crash but when he saw no one there he though maybe he had drank to much of his spiked coffee."

Passerby:"Spiked coffee?"

Lead officer: "Yes, some drivers believe that the kick helps keep them awake and relaxed. We have the man in custody right now and will question him when he is more sober. Is there anything else you can tell us from you point of view on the events that occured?"

Passerby:"No, its pretty much as I told you before. We saw the truck before coming up but paid no mind to it. When we came around the curve we saw some damage to the guard rail and thought that there may have been accident and slowed down in case they hadn't finished cleaning up or moving the cars so others could pass. When we saw the full extent of the damage of the guard rail, I stopped the car and asked my girlfriend to call 911. From there I helped as much as I could until you guys showed up."

Just as the passerby finishes his statement one of the paramedics that has been helping with Tsyuko and Chelsea comes up to the officer to tell him how they kids are.

Paramedic: "Officer a word please"

Lead officer (to passerby): "Excuse me" (Now to the paramedic) "How are the kids doing?"

Paramedic: "They are both bruised and cut from the initial crash. The girl has a dislocated shoulder but that's it as far any real injuries. The boy has a gash and a possible concussion but we would need to get him to the hospital before we can confirm that. Otherwise some rest and some pain medicine would help them through the rest but the real problem is their mental state."

Lead officer: "Their mental state? What do you mean?"

Paramedic: Its not uncommon in these situations but the kids have been rather unresponsive outside of crying even when we looking at the boy he just sat there. Not a twitch or cringe of pain as we look at his gash applied some stitches. While the girl did cry when we popped her shoulder back into place she keeps asking for her parents. These kids need some family around, they have gone through a lot and the thought of losing their parents must not be sitting well right now. Have we been able to reach any of their family?"

Lead officer:" It was hard but we reached their aunt who will be waiting for you and the children at the hospital. Now we are just waiting on news from the others that went to the crash site..."

The lead officer is looking over towards the cliff side where the search team went down and see's a young officer coming up with a paramedic, both with sadden looks. The lead officer bracing for the worse then hears the young officer speak

Young Officer (with a sadden tone): "We found the parents....."

Lead officer (While wiping away at his face due to the frustration of knowing what they are about to say): "Dont tell me."

Search team Paramedic (In a somber tone): " They were already gone when we got there, the woman snapped her neck on impact and the man died due to blood loss, we just barely didn't make it for him."

Lead Officer (with a sadden tone and sigh): " Have you told the kids?"

Young officer: "No sir, we believe it still to soon to tell them with everything that they have gone through right now."

Lead officer: "I know its tough but we have to do it. Otherwise we could end up hurting these kids worse."

While the conversation between the officers and paramedics, another group of paramedics are hoisting the gurneys with Tsyuko's and Chelsea parents on them. It is a slow process and Tsyuko has been looking in their direction to see if his parents are coming up. When the gurneys reach the top they are properly propped up and pushed toward the second ambulance there. As the lead policeman and the others finish their conversation they see the gurneys passing between them and the children when one of them hits a bump on the road toppling of the gurney showing the lifeless hand of Tsyuko and Chelsea's mother.

Tsyuko jumps from the ambulance to rush to his mothers side. The lead officer seeing this intercepts Tsyuko as Tsyuko is crying and calling out to his mother, erupting his emotions from being so quiet before.

Tsyuko (crying and yelling): "Mom! Mom! Mom, please get up. Mom!"

The lead officer can't do anything but hold back Tsyuko as the paramedics carefully zip the bag up and place her back on the gurney. The police officer overwhelmed at the amount of grief he feels from Tsyuko, gives tsyuko a hug and tells him the only thing he can at this time.

 

Lead officer: "Im sorry. Im so sorry."

 

As the officer is holding him, Tsyuko begins to feel light headed and begins to lower his voice as he is still calling out to his mother while the muffled sound of Chelsea doing the same as everything goes black for Tsyuko.  The officer notices that Tsyuko has gone limp and immediately calls the paramedics over to check on him. Tsyuko fades in and out of consciousness to see bright lights and doctors around him, fading again and coming back he see's his aunt Noumi with Chelsea near a door as Tsyuko fades again. When Tsyuko awakens his aunt is there to hold him and thanks god he is okay.

 

Remembering the word of his father at the time

 

Tsyuko's Father: "Do you miss her Tsyuko"

 

Tsyuko: "I do dad but boys don't cry right, that's how we stay strong right"

 

Tsyuko's father "Funerals are here for us to cry, its then one time we can as we say goodbye for the final time until we are able to see them again. Its okay son, cry your heart out, a boy shouldn't have to be strong when saying goodbye to his mom"

 

Tsyuko cry's harshly and loudly as his father holds him and we fade back to the current funeral and he has a tearful blank expression as Friends of the family come to see how they are and his aunt near them patting  Tsyuko on the back while Chelsea is crying into her aunts shoulder. Late in the afternoon, after the funeral, Tsyuko finishes cleaning the living room and sits down to think of what he should do.

Tsyuko near his family's new shrine simply looks to it and asks

 

Tsyuko: "What should I do"?" after some silence he begins to cry more.

 

Tsyuko:"You said you were right behind us, but now your not here. What should I do about school, what should I do about Chelsea, what will she do, I don't know how to help her."

 

now yelling as if arguing with his parents.

 

Tsyuko: "why did you lie and say you were okay. Why, what are we going to do" now collapsing to the ground

 

"What are we going to do with out you, how can I help Chelsea. Why did this have to happen."

Tsyuko's aunt seeing this slowly walks in to check on her nephew.

Tsyuko"I'm sorry I wanted to celebrate getting into the arts academy. If we didn't you would be" Tsyuko's aunt grabbing onto him simply hugs him and says

don't you ever feel sorry or responsible for this, no one could have seen this coming, its more disrespectful to your parents to that. Its defiantly not your fault."

Tsyuko "Then what do I do" Tsyukos aunt "You can cry your heart knowing its not your fault and that your parents loved the both of you so much" Chelsea is asleep in the hallway to the living room with a stuffed bear her dad got her while Tsyuko cry's his eyes out. An hour later, he takes some time to think, Tsyuko asks if the can live on their own if he can make money for them to live. Tsyukos aunt "why do you want to live alone after all of this" Tsyuko "I think it would be best for the both of us, me and Chelsea, if we had some time to ourselves after all of this" Tsyuko's aunt being the blood sister to his father and remembering his blood mothers funeral, simply stays quiet to think it over. They inherited a lot of money that can help them get by for a year at least, Tsyuko's aunt then agrees on the condition that she stay with them until he finds a job and they have a stable living style. Tsyuko, gets frustrated at first but then realizes that he still doesn't know how to handle the situation for himself yet alone for Chelsea too. So he reluctantly agrees

 

A year passes and Tsyuko is working to keep a healthy amount of money and still going to school but his grades aren't the best. If he doesn't pick them up he will be transferred to the regular class program within the school and unable to participate in any music classes. By burying himself in work and school, house chores and checking on Chelsea, have kept him from thinking about the day his parents died. The school day has ended as he thinks on the fact it has been one whole year since his parents died but glad he has had a special sister like Chelsea, his best friend Yosuke comes by asking him about the upcoming test then notices he his zoned out and not listening. Yosuke then sneaks behind Tsyuko and tickle him, as Tsyuko laughs for a few minutes then jumps away. Tsyuko" what kind of man tickles another man" Yosuke "The best friend kind", they share a small laugh together. Yosuke "Lets head to the roof before we leave, we still have time because of after school activities. You don't have work today right? Tsyuko "Yea, Im off today". They both head up the roof of the school to continue the conversation, Yosuke "So, whats on you mind", Tsyuko "Its been a year since my parents died and Chlesea slowly stopped being herself" Yosuke "It cant be helped with what you two went through. Everyone deals with that sort of thing differently, all we can do is be there for her". Chelsea has become  a neet refusing to leave her room in the house except for food and bathroom responsibilities. She has taken up online classes to keep up with school, she was a year under Tsyuko before the incident and has kept up her studies and is currently in her first year of high school as far as classes go. Tsyuko "I know its been tough on her too,the first two months it was hard to get her to eat anything but luckily my aunt helped me with that and she gradually got better, but I'm also glad she has been here like she has, whenever I need someone to hear me out she is there and tells me stuff I honestly think my mom would say and sometimes its in her own way that gives me hope she will go back to public school again one day." Yosuke "It almost sounds like you in love with her, you lolicon" . Tsuko thinks it over before responding then says "Yea I do love her", Yosuke " Of course you do your her brother" Tsyuko turns to Yosuke with a bit of a happy and calm look to say "I think I love her, more than just a sister though" Yosuke "Wait a minute Tsyuko, are you sure you want to go down that road. I know your not related by blood or anything like that, but once you do this there is no going back. What if she recluses further or decides to move out, I know you couldn't take that man" Tsyuko "I know what your saying but its a strong warmth that I get from her, its not like a big brother, nor like a fathers love, I think this is love, love ya know." Yosuke playful punches Tsyuko's shoulder "I know. well as your best friend you know I will support you as best as I can, just call us batman and superman." Tsyuko "I don't think either of us could be superman" Yosuke " Hey now..." they both burst into laughter.

 

Once the conversation was done Tsyuko walked with Yosuke to the bus station and headed straight home from there which was a ten minute walk, I think I will make Chelsea's favorites tonight. He arrives home, drops off his shool bad on the table while heading to the cabinets to grab food and seasonings and begins to prepare dinner, while preparing dinner Chelsea comes down for dinner early to talk to him. Chelsea in a monotone voice " Tsyuko, I need to talk to you" Surprised Tsyuko stops making dinner for a second and asks " What is it" Chelsea gets distracted by the smell of dinner "Dinner smells great, what are you making" Tsyuko "I'm making all your favorites for dinner tonight katsu, mashed potatoes, pasta salad and regular salad with extra onions" Chelsea "You remembered that I like extra onions" Tsyuko "how could I forget, during the first two months when mom and dad were first together you ate a whole onion and had onion breath the rest of the day, I picked on you while mom and dad bought fresh gum." Chelsea is now quiet with a sadden look on her face. Tsyuko now worried "Whats wrong Chelsea" Chelsea bluntly and clearly says "I don't want to live with you anymore" Tsyuko scarcely surprised " what do you mean? That's not a really good joke." Chelsea stays quiet and just looks at her brother with somewhat empty eyes. Tsyuko "If I said something or did something wrong you can tell me, you know that right. So tell me what I did and I can fix it". After a brief pause Chelsea then says "Being with you brings back to many painful memories, I don't want to remember, so I'm going to take my part of the money that mom and dad left and move in with auntie." Tsyuko now somewhat panicked "Why, why would you want to leave, We can get through if we have each other as we have over this last year. I can help you we can live like we use too: Chelsea sharply "I don't want to, I don't want to remember any of the past anymore. I just don't want to be were all I can do is remember mom and dad, we still live in the same town as we did which was fine at first but all I can do is remember who mom knew, who dad talked to and where we use to go", she says this while tearing up. Tsyuko "Whats wrong with remembering those things. Its those memories that help us keep them in our hearts that they loved us, so why would you want to forget that." Chelsea yells "It hurts to much, I want mom here, I want dad, why did everything happen, well if we are going to live an unfair life without them then, I don't want to be somewhere where all I can do is think of them, its a living hell that way." Tsyuko is taken back and reaches out for Chelsea as she turns away ever so slightly and says "I will take dinner in my room tonight to give you some time." Tsyuko " Don't do this, all we got is each other, we have each other and aunt Mio, and I love you Chelsea, isn't that enough." Chelsea "I love you too, more than you really know, but I just want to forget everything and let it go. Good night Tsyuko". Chelsea leaves the room and walks up to her room upstairs. When Tsyuko hears the door close he goes back to finish the food quietly, he takes Chelsea her plate while his is already ready on the table. Once he returns to the table, he collapses into the chair at the table and begins to question everything about his life so far, how can he help his sister, how can he get her to stay, how can he show her his love that he has to fill that pit of despair left by losing their parents. Tsyuko thinks about this all night as he sobs the entire time and until he falls asleep.

 

The next week Tsyuko is quiet in class and a minimalist at work. The day after that Yosuke comes over to Tsyuko to talk to him after school on the school roof. When school ends, Tsyuko reluctantly comes to the roof and opens with "What do you want" Yosuke "Whats going on Tsyuko, your clearly not yourself." Tsyuko "Don't worry about it, it will resolve itself in no time, just like everything else" as Tsyuko begins to leave Yosuke begins to fear the worse that Tsyuko may be planning suicide and quickly grabs him. Yosuke "Don't you walk away like that, don't you walk away like you've already given up and died. Tell me what happened or I'm going to punch you until you do" Tsyuko angrily and quietly says "Go ahead and do it then, I don't care enough to stop you nor tell you anything." Yosuke angry pulls his fist as far back as he can and with all his strength, weight, and speed he punches Tsyuko. Tsyuko is slightly surprised at the fact that Yosuke actually punched him. Yosuke "We've been friends for a long time, since we were kinds, since your birth mother passed and I have never seen you like this. You tell me you don't care enough, then I will by showing you how much I care, If that hurt you still haven't fully given up but don't you dare go around saying your okay while looking like that. Your clearly not okay so talk to me dammit. I'm your best friend, there is nothing I wont listen too when you need me." Tsyuko begins to tear up as he begins to explain that Chelsea wants to move away to live with their aunt and forget about the memories, their family. Tsyuko "Chelsea wants to leave, she wants to forget about mom and dad, she wants to forget about what we all shared here, she wants to forget me. I don't know what to do, how can I keep her here. Tell me, someone anyone, what the hell am I suppose to do when my own little sister doesn't want to be around me." Yosuke then gets down on a knee then puts his hand on Tsyukos shoulder and says "You ask help from friends and family, you let them help you as much as possible to share the weight of your world so it never gets too heavy." Yosuke then gives Tsyuko a hug, Tysuko then stands up to lean on the guard rail and asks "What do I do then Yosuke". Yosuke "Call your aunt and ask her for some help or advice, I can always stop by a little more often and see we can all go out somewhere. We can even ask some local priests what to do." Tsyuko "Priests?" Yosuke " Yea, there are some Shinto, Buddhist, and Christain temples near by that we can go talk to them and see what they can advise to us about your sister and how to help." Tsyuko "Why are you going so far for me?" Yosuke "Your best friend man, your practically my brother and I want to help you however I can so you never end up this low again." Tsyuko gives a reassured smile to himself. Yosuke "We can check out the temples over the weekend and see whats up then. Since its Friday, I'm gonna ask my mom if I can stay at your place so we can do exactly that as early as possible." As Yosuke walks away to call his mother Tsyuko turns to him and says "Thank you Yosuke" Yosuke then gives Tsyulo a thumbs up and makes his call home. Talking to his mother he explains that Tsyuko needs some help right now and wants to help his friend. Yosukes mother understands and allows Yosuke to stay over the weekend and will be by to bring him some cloths to change into. After the phone call Yosuke and Tsyuko walk to Tsyuko's house, when Yosuke suddenly says "Don't think this weekend help is completely free, I want some food, I haven't tried you food since you told me you learned to cook for you and your sister, and Im also getting my mom to bring over some games we can play." Tsyuko "I thought we were going to the temples tomorrow?" Yosuke "We are going to the temples tomorrow, but we are going to have fun when we aren't there". They both share a laugh as they walk into Tsyuko's house and night fades into morning.

What will Tsyuko try to do?Not knowing where to turn what will Tsyuko do about school and his sister? Will he give up on his dream? Let his sister greave? Where will Tsyuko find his answers?
If want to know how this ends tell me in the comments below

genre: Tragedy, Philosophical, Psychological, Slice of Life, and Romance

Authors note: Chelsea and her mother are American, her mom a soldier station in Japan when she met and fell in love with Tsyuko's father. Yosuke has known Tsyuko since his birth mother passed away, they met in class in the upcoming school year his birth mother passed away, they fought at first but then became the best of friends since.

Discussion (8)

  1. The A.C.

    First, Light Novels have an unique style that i am even still working on to master, make sure to look into this on the internet or something. The paragraphs need to be broken up a lot more, especially anytime someone else speaks. There were only 8 really long paragraph, and it is hard to tell when who is speaking so make a sure there is a better way to distinguish who is talking (right now it seems like a screen play where you put the character’s name then their line). There is a lot of punctuation and wording problems as well. I recommend changing the part where the passerby is talking to the police; make their conversation more about the wreck and not what the passerby was doing before because it does not seem relevant at all. Those are the main points that need to be worked on first. Again, you should do some research into how to write in a Light Novel style, and analyze how some published Light Novels are written.

    1. Giovanni Post author

      Okay, I will get right on those edits. Do I just need to google Light novel examples or is there a specific website to look it?
      When it comes to the conversation, I understand and will add to it but the additional information about why they have rope was from a fan and writer view. I thought people would think it was to convenient for someone to just have rope at anytime, or am I trying to add to much detail for that situation?

        1. Giovanni Post author

          Thank you. I will use this to help me out,I will probably use the western one more or try to figure out my own balance between the two.

  2. Kyrin Knightsbridge

    Haihai, @shirookami1914, just a few quick thoughts to expand on what’s already been said;

    Stylistically speaking this piece needs some serious work. As @theacstories mentioned, the walls of text need to be broken up a lot more to make the entire piece easier to get through. In its current form your paragraphs are really difficult to read – it’s very easy to lose your place in a paragraph sometimes just because they’re so long.

    Generally speaking light novel writing uses paragraphing really liberally. There’s no hard and fast rule for deciding how and when to paragraph; it’s usually best to just end a paragraph where it feels natural to continue onto the next paragraph. Lines of dialogue are also separated by paragraphs as a matter of course; because a typical light novel doesn’t usually specify the speaker in the manner of traditional novels ( … said Chelsea, whispered Tsyuko, etc), it’s very important that this is done so your readers are able to work out which character is supposed to be giving voice to a given line of dialogue.

    Pacing-wise, I personally found the inconsistent skipping not very well done. In fact, the timeskips kind of breaks immersion – one second we’re reading about the accident, the next the parents’ funeral a month later, and that’s followed by another one-year timeskip in the very next paragraph. I’m not sure whether these arbitrary timeskips were intentional or not, but all in all the overall experience was that much worse for it. To top it off, you’ve written this piece in such a way that there’s not really a sequential feel to events – the accident, which is obviously the defining emotional scene that sets the tone for the rest of the piece, comes out of nowhere, with no foreshadowing; Chelsea’s decision to move out to live with her aunt, which I assume is also intended to encourage your readers to empathise with your protagonist, is similarly a bolt from the blue. While leading your readers on and later springing a plot twist on them can be a useful way to build and sustain interest in your piece, the way this piece is written does not make use of it effectively. Instead the overall effect is to make the piece feel rushed, overly so despite the verbiage.

    One way of remedying these two issues could be to expand a lot more on the gaps between events in your plot; there’s easily dozens more pages of material that you could add to what you already have. I’d suggest really exploring several specific elements of your piece to make it more thought-provoking and emotionally powerful – (i) the dynamics of the relationship between Tsyuko and Chelsea in the aftermath of the accident; (ii) Tsyuko and Chelsea’s emotional state both immediately following the accident and a year after it; and (iii) Tsyuko and Yosuke’s interactions. To this end, it might be useful to pose yourself a few questions as you write; does Chelsea resent Tsyuko for their parents’ death, and if so, is she emotionally conflicted about it, and how does she justify her resentment, even though Tsyuko is obviously not to blame? How do the two siblings interact in the months after the accident? Tsyuko obviously feels a measure of guilt at indirectly being the cause of the accident, but how does the deaths of his parents affect him personally, what are his thoughts about his estranged relationship with Chelsea? How has the accident changed him, for better or for worse, and how has he coped with it, to what extent has he allowed it to affect him, his mental state, his worldview? I’m not sure if you intend for Yosuke to play a larger role in the next installments of your piece, but if so it might also be useful to familiarise your readers with him; as things stand, he seems to be a cardboard cutout of a best friend character who only exists to provide Tsyuko with token emotional support. What are his own feelings about his best friend’s predicament, and does he have a plan to help Tsyuko resolve said predicament? Does he have any motives for doing so beyond a desire to see Tsyuko back on his feet again?

    I’ll also take the liberty of answering your questions for @theacstories (sorry if I’m overstepping a little here!) – the best way to get an idea of how a light novel is written would be to look at examples of actual, published light novels. Try to find light novels that have been localised – i.e. the rights acquired by English-language publishers and professionally translated for the Western market – as opposed to fan or casual translations, which can sometimes take liberties with grammar and vocabulary. If you can read Japanese, the way to go would be to acquire copies of Japanese light novels and read those – they are the gold standard for light novels after all.

    Detail in writing is not generally a bad thing to have, but it takes a certain degree of acuity and experience to understand where detail is necessary to embellish a scene, and where it’s merely superfluous fluff that detracts from the overarching plot. In this case I don’t necessarily think the detail is a bad thing to have, but instead of presenting it the way you’ve done, perhaps try an alternative approach; maybe slip it into passing conversation? An idea would be for the police officers attending the scene to mention it while talking to Tsyuko or Chelsea, something along the lines of ‘it’s a good thing he had that rope with him while going climbing, otherwise you two would also have been either seriously injured, or worse still, dead’.

    You seem to already have a good idea of the story you want to tell. It’s just that the technical aspects of your writing do still need polishing; grammar, word choices, phrasing, sentence structure, formatting, dialogue, etcetera all definitely need to be refined. Keep at it, though, and I’m sure you’ll see definite improvement in time. Anyway, I hope my remarks on this piece turn out to be helpful for you; if you have any further questions for me, don’t hesitate to let me know!

    1. Giovanni Post author

      I don’t know why but the first comment I sent is showing but when I click on it, it immediately disappears. It may be a site glitch, I am not too sure. I may be doing something and not realizing it, it is 2:40am here and my tiredness may have finally affected me lol.

  3. Giovanni Post author

    I don’t know what happened to my previous comment but I really and sincerely apologize if I offended you in anyway if you deleted it. It wasn’t my intention to that. I am extremely grateful for the advice, I just thought you were going too rip me a new one when I first glanced at it but I have already found it more helpful than I can express and I am already applying your advice to my work. Again I apologize for any rudeness on my part.

  4. Kyrin Knightsbridge

    Just reposting here to make sure @shirookami1914 sees my post ^~^

    You’re most welcome! I’m sorry if my critique came off to you as a slaughterfest; I’ve been told I’m a harsh critic before, as I tend to home in on the weaknesses of a piece before anything else. Please, do take my criticism in the spirit in which it’s made – rest assured that it’s intended to be constructive ^~^

    I’d be happy to elaborate further. With regards to pacing it’s really a matter of finding the right pace. which can differ from piece to piece. Say I was writing a light novel revolving around a high school sports team. In this case, it would be prudent for me to use timeskips, as appropriate, so that my readers aren’t bored; the bread and butter of a light novel about sports has to be the actual matches/competitions, and an author writing such a light novel needs to understand that. It’s what your readers are looking forward to. If I went and wrote a hundred pages about a five day training camp, it wouldn’t matter how well the actual material was written; the pacing is an absolute car crash, showing a lack of maturity in writing, and most readers would no doubt be put off by it.

    It’s the same for any piece. Looking at it again, I’d say that your piece can, chronologically, be broadly divided into three portions; before the accident, after the accident (including the funeral), and the aftermath (one year afterwards). You should recognise how you’ve divvied up your piece, consciously or otherwise, and use that knowledge to plan the pacing of the story you’re telling.

    With regards to (2), I appreciate that you’ve mentioned Chelsea’s reasons for leaving her brother in favour of living with her aunt. The problem is, there’s absolutely no extra detail, nor is there appropriate foreshadowing; she just comes out, says she’s going to leave, and lists out her reasons for doing so. That doesn’t make her actions emotionally justifiable to the average reader; it doesn’t make us relate to her as a character. Since you’re writing in third-person omniscient, my suggestion would be to drop subtle hints about Chelsea’s impending bombshell throughout your piece.

    For instance, you could have her gradually retreat into her shell. I’ll list a hypothetical scenario for the sake of explaining; let’s say Chelsea used to spend her time after school hanging out with Tsyuko. Now, after the accident, you could hint that she begins to spend less and less time with her brother; perhaps have a scene where Tsyuko’s eating dinner alone without Chelsea’s company. Or have Chelsea space out while Tsyuko’s talking to her (reminiscing about her dead parents, perhaps?) Bonus points if you had a scene before the accident to contrast with; Tsyuko and Chelsea having dinner at a family restaurant, a moody, depressed Chelsea presenting a stark contrast with the Chelsea before the accident. There are a lot of things you could do to improve this element of your piece, and I’ll leave them up to your imagination. And yes, this should fall under filling in the right details.

    When it comes to (3), there’s no right or wrong way of presenting Yosuke and his role in the larger plot. What you do have to make sure to do, however, is to present him in a way that doesn’t make him a boilerplate character. As I mentioned in my earlier comments – tell us about him. Show us what he’s up to as the plot progresses. Make him a character with whom the reader can make an emotional connection; and above all, make him a multifaceted character who’s not just there to be Random Stranger A. By doing this, you’ll bring what is now but an unheralded supporting character to life, and your story will be all the better for it.

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